Planet Heck: Early Bird Gets the Worm

[Vize Viper]

[dice=6] Evil
[dice=6] Slippy



OWNED.

Not only was Falco covered in a burning hairball, he got SHOT IN THE BUTT, TOO.

"GAH! What is this, toast the bird day!?"[rand=10840911990382573210685384044785651501160715319727827822250684213]

[slomoto]

[dice=6]First shot
[dice=6]Second shot

Evil was grazed by both shots, and took it as his cue to leap free of the falcon target. "A minor setback," he muttered. "But no matter, soon you will all be enslaved to my will. Attack!"

From the magma-heated ground, several snowmen like the one they had just battled rose from the ground and moved, swaying towards the pilots. [rand=1734998153397671940391716352814520944061504436218655961696628631]

[AnT]

'Second squad, seize them!' She ordered, still pinned under the cheese. The snowmen that held the pilots back moved in for the pain.

"AH-hahahahhahahahahahah!!!!" That sinister laugh...sounded like it came from the heavens. It sounded so...psychotic. "AH-hahahahhahahahahahah!!!!"

"Huh?" Mia was getting very worried by that cackle. 'My lord, what is-"

"EAT DIRT, FOUL MOLDED MEN OF FLURRY!!! AH HAHAHAHA!!!!"

And what came was violent rain; a rain of golden blasts that came down on the hellish earth like bombs. The poor evil snowmen ran for their lives in fear...but when you look at one, it gets blown to bits. Falco and Slippy would feel like they're in the middle of a warzone...a war that is not aiming for them. So they better not move, or get caught in the many explosions around the land.

[SHM 128 III]

All Slippy could do was stare slackjawed at the sudden volley of bullets that were now obliterating snowmen left and right. When one of the shots landed a bit too close for comfort, however, Slippy jumped into the air a bit and quickly squatted down and put his hands over his head.

"Look out, Falco! It's a deadly golden shower!"

[Vize Viper]

Falco just glanced over at Slippy, wondering if he'd used THAT particular phrase on purpose.

"... Not deadly to us if we just hold still."

[slomoto]

Evil merely looked up at the raining plasma shots and face-faulted.

"Oh... this will not be pleasant."

He snuck towards his two fallen comrades and made attempts to revive them, beginning by trying to slice Mia free from her cheezy prison. "Must....cut....the cheese!"

[1 pass, 2 fail]
[dice=2][rand=5554158653560922114438797518336527279951596737775841598053108512]

[AnT]

Mia whimpered, still pinned under the rocky cheese. "I smell like Limburger."

The plasma rain stopped, leaving a soft rumbling sound in the aftermath. Many and many holes in the magma earth...more than usual. Melted snow littered the land...a streak of smoke flew out of the red sky. With the sound of a jet, the streak of smoke headed for the throne area. The smoke streaked by, and a mighty warrior in a space suit jumped out of it, with a small jet engine in hand.

The being had a strong stance, with thanks to his muscular stature under the white clothed suit. Blue straps were wrapped around his shoulders in a X, connected to a small blue belt. While he had skinny legs, he had powerful arms, with blue gloves to boot. He held a small red blaster, a simple shape and design. But from the way it was smoking, it was hard to believe that little thing made that rain of destruction.

But what was strange about him was his body was entirely a suit. The wearer of this suit appeared to be a giant earthworm with large eyes, and a mouth. He had quite a dopey face, but fierce at the same time.

"Ho, bale incarnate of vileness! Your internal nemesis, Earthworm Jim, has arrived!!" Looking at the two pilots, he gave goofy grin. "Hi there! Hope you didn't get caught in my rain of destruction."


The woman blinked at the newcomer. 'This...is your arch enemy, my lord?' This was the first time she seen him, and frankly...she can't figure out how this idiotic being defeats her lord time and time again....besides with that insane blasting.

[SHM 128 III]

*blink*

Cue more staring by Slippy. Were they just saved by a worm? A worm in a spacesuit and using a gun that could apparently obliterate an entire army, sure, but still... a worm.

Captured by snowmen, menaced by a cat, and saved by a worm... They were gonna have a fun time trying to debrief this to Peppy when they got back.

"Uh... No, we're fine," Slippy replied, trying to be as polite as possible despite his awkwardness, "thanks for the help!"

[slomoto]

"This does NOT concern you WORM. I enslaved these people fair and square!" Evil double-blinked. "Oh I forgot....you're a moron." Evil's hardened face turned soft and sympathetic and he threw his tiny white body at the worm's feet. "Oh, woe is me. I am beaten and defeated....There is nothing I can do to keep you from, say, I don't know, rescuing the young woman that my henchrat has encapsulated in cheese and further foiling my plans." He opened one eye twisted towards Jim in hopes that the worm takes the bait.

"Um Jim," a small voice from an even smaller puppy in a green shirt and black shorts approached from behind Jim. "This is obviously an evil scheme, and I would like for once to not fall for it."

[Vize Viper]

Falco just... stared for a moment... then turned.

"That's it. I'm going home. This is a bit much."

[AnT]

"Ah ha! I found your weak footing to your treacherous plan!" Rushing up to the prisoned woman, Jim hammered his fist on the cheese, shattering it to pebbles. "Come, fair maiden! You are free from Evil's dairy grasps...but uh...just to warn you, I'm taken."

Smirking, the woman stood up, dryly saying, "Yeah...my hero..."

And with a powerful kick, Mia sent Jim flying at Falco.

"BUT I'M SURE YOU'LL FIND SOMEBODYYYYYYYY!!!!"

[dice=6][rand=624565632631623589022693885463220287614076048906545695283829829791]

[SHM 128 III]

Slippy was about to ask Falco to come back, but after witnessing what had happened between Jim and Mia, something completely different came out of his mouth instead.

"FALCO! LOOK OUT! YOU'RE GONNA GET WORMS!"

[slomoto]

Peter looked over at Slippy queerly for a moment, then slapped his knee and sputtered in laughter. "Hah-hah, that's the best one yet!" He took a moment to produce a notepad that had 'sidekick skullduggery' written on the cover and wrote down what the frog had just said. "I think I have one for parrots, hang on..." He flipped rapidly through the pages.

Evil began a classic villain rant of his own. "Foolish Worm! Meet the latest lieutenant in my soulless lawyer army. It took a lot of work to rip from her the strong sense of law and justice, but I see it was well worth it."

[Vize Viper]

[dice=6]

Falco just turned towards Slippy to ask what the heck he was going on about when...

WORM TO FACE. Now, being a bird, this wouldn't be a problem. If Falco were hungry. ... And feral.

But he was neither. Just pinned.

"Get. OFFA ME!" With a growl, Falco brought his feet up between him and Jim, and kicked him off.[rand=146347578023928958118640210702974892537742242871343432360999133424]

[AnT]

Course that led Jim's face to the floor as he landed. Dazed, he smiled with some broken teeth. "Kay...I'll get off after these messages...oy..."

With the worm dealt with, the soulless lawyer walked towards Slippy, holding up her hand in front of her chest. Her long nails morphed and sharpened on their own. "Now, on to the next case. Little froggy, you are charged of resisting the lord's orders to be tormented."

From out of nowhere, Mia pulled out a briefcase. "Now, face the wrath of the neiner clause!"

Thrusting it forward, the briefcase opened, firing a fireball, with paper forms around it.

"Nothing can survive that!"

[dice=6][rand=437830480795549541705253819690199888224729385839121817381174029582]